This is some sexist BS

Got a letter from the state IRS.  Actually it was addressed only to Nate.  Even though we filed jointly and the issue is with MY W2.  It stated that not only do we now OWE money, but we also owe a late fee.  Even though this is the first time the state has contacted us (I called THEM last week).  So I create an account to upload our documents and find out that the registration code is only good for NATE.  Again, even though we filed jointly.  So I create an account for Nate and find he has like 10 notifications about our taxes.  How the hell does he have notifications from February when we just created the account today?! And why are those same notifications not on MY account?  Is it because he's a MAN?  Ugh.  I'm so frustrated.